Bucket List

Every time I am on Facebook, I keep seeing this ad for Denver's Bucket List, ya know, things to do in Denver before you die, and that got me to thinking about things I want to do.

This could be fun.  Think about it, what would you do if you could?  Let's say money, job, lack of time, none of it matters.  What is on your bucket list?

 I totally want to swim in warm melted chocolate.  I mean really, could there be anything better?  Take the best candy, melt it down, and just back float in it!  Granted, I'd gain a good amount of weight, but it would be worth it!

I've always wanted to box.  Put me in the ring coach!  I'm ready for the action, let me knock a sucker out!  Well, maybe I should just stick to being the girl who holds the round cards.  Do you have to fit into a bikini for that?

May sound crazy, but every time I watch that show on Discovery about Everest, holy cow, I can almost feel the wind wiping around my face, and I keep thinking I would love to just see Mt. Everest.  To feel the mountain beneath my feet!  If I was nutty, I'd totally climb it, but I would settle for being at the base of the mountain, big parka on, escorted by one of those little Tibetan boys and a pack mule.  Ahh...how lovely.

Hot air balloon ride
Stay a month on a private island
Swim with dolphins
Scuba dive
Move my kids into their first apartment
Have coffee in Italy
Hike at Yosemite National Park
Build my own home
Run a half marathon
See the sunset and sunrise in Hawaii
Visit an ashram in India

The list could keep going and going.  I keep thinking of silly things too, like being married long enough to have a 50th Wedding Anniversary, and holding a half dozen puppies at one time.  Learning to make sushi and go on a yoga retreat.  I think I want to wear a mini-skirt and actually look good in it!  Stay in a smoking awesome suite in Las Vegas and live like a high roller!  I think I want to go on tour with that host, Guy Fiere, and hit all the Diners, Drive-In's, and Dives, or whatever it's called, and eat the countries most mouth watering comfort foods out there!

But for now, my list is just a list, and maybe I'll put going to Costco on my Bucket List, and when I go there today and buy dog food, I'll be able to say I crossed something off the list!

Super Star Life of the Unemployed

I've been unemployed since January 3rd.  People say things like, enjoy your time off, what are you going to do with yourself?  Your kids must love that you are home.  Yep,my thoughts exactly...yeah right.

I am living the leisure life of the super star unemployed.  I wake up, take the kids to school, come home, and typically as I stand in the shower I decide do I shave my legs or not today?  They are minorly prickly, I mean they don't irritate me when I try to sleep at night yet, but shaving my legs would burn about 3 minutes out of my morning.  So why not shave.  While I am in the shower I decide to reorganize the toothbrushes, toothpaste, and shampoo.  Ah yes...the leisure life.

I sit each morning in front of the computer, scanning for jobs worthy enough for me to apply for.  Do I apply for the entry level secretary job or do I shoot for the director of financial analysis.  Yep, I'm either over qualified or under qualified.  So I close the laptop and immerse myself in terrible day time TV.  Usually an episode of Say Yes to the Dress, or Keeping Up with the Kardashians, and I just find the Style Network, and they have show called Ruby and Too Fat for Fifteen.  If I am lucky, I catch a four hour run of Roseanne.  Ah yes, the leisure life.

I find myself meandering Wal-Mart for two hours, putting only milk, yogurt, and clearance bread in my cart.  I'm on an unemployed budget, and I can meander Wal-Mart all I want, smelling the different candles, caressing the sheets, and holding jammies up to myself, but buying them is out of the question.

I somehow get pulled into helping out at the boys school.  I mean really, how many mom's show up with hot chocolate and marshmallow's for holiday parties?  Yep, just me.  And I even found time to cut fabric for aprons, and for fun, I cut my finger so I can sit in the ER and visit the people there while I got 5 stitches. Ah the leisure life.

Last week I went to 5 yoga classes in 4 days, cleaned underneath my bed, scrubbed the only toilet we have at least 3 times, vacuumed so much that the tracks are permanent.  All the winter hats and gloves are matched appropriately, all the socks have been matched up, and even the dogs are clean.  I found myself wondering if I could paint the living room while the cookies are baking.  Ah the leisure life.

I found myself mixing a margarita at 10:45am one day....hey, it's 5 o'clock somewhere right?  It was worth it!  Then there are days like today where I stayed in my jammies until 1pm, but all the laundry did get done.  They there are days that I have make-up on and hair done before I drop the kids off at 8am.  I have a project list of things to accomplish.  But I am finding that now I even sit on hold for 2 hours with unemployment, just to hear a human voice.  Ah the leisure life.

I hope I didn't blow the lid off of people's dreams about the life of the unemployed.  It's obviously a very leisurely life.  Pretty soon I will pick up horse back riding lessons, and pottery classes, all while I am interviewing live in nanny's.  I mean really, who can afford to work these days when there are so many pressing issues in the life of the leisure, like do I wipe the shelves of the fridge today, or do I clean the lint trap on the dryer?  Do I re-caulk the tub?  What about taking time to floss twice a day?  Ah the leisure life!

Yoga-Groupie

I began yoga about a year and half ago.  I had gone to a few classes a time or two and even own a DVD or two, but hadn't gotten really serious about it until a year or so ago.  I started for the physical benefits, and over time it has transformed itself into much more than that.  I began classes with Yogi Liz at 24 Hour Fitness, and instantly gravitated toward her.  I took two classes a week with her and soon became a full fledged groupie, showing up at her other studios and even a yoga workshop or two.  How times change, at one time it was such a great dream to be a groupie for Poison, Motley Crew, or heck even for Dave Matthews Band, and now I found myself being a yoga groupie.  It's comical how your priorities change with age, two kids, a husband, and laundry duty, and now I dream about working at a job I can wear my yoga pants at all day.

To my dismay, Yogi Liz has recently left for Dubai, to be a yoga-guru on an international level, sigh, and I am partially jealous that I can't pack all I own in a suit case, sling my yoga mat over my shoulder and hit the trail with her, and live my own version of Eat, Pray, Love.  Despite my mild depression over the fact that she has left, I continue on. I keep going to yoga classes, sizing up all the other teachers, comparing them to Liz and feeling horribly deflated by the fact that I can't seem to find one that I like nearly as much!

So there I sat in yoga, seven o'clock at night, trying desperately to quiet my monkey mind and settle into my meditation pose.  And next to me is a much too skinny girl, wearing some sort of polyester pants, shiny, tight pants, smacking and popping her gum.   For heaven sake, the girl hadn't even taken her socks off.  She is obviously not serious about this yoga bit, but at least her outfit is nice. SIGH...just breath.  Obviously this poor girl has no idea that I am soothing a broken heart-chakra, and really need to center myself.  So I breath a bit deeper, close my eyes tighter, and continue to listen the the instructor fail at being Liz, but she's trying.
Downward facing dog, breathing in, breathing out, cat cow, breathing in, breathing out, boat pose, and still the girl next to me is smacking her gum, and she has re-done her pony tail 15 times, flicking overly straightened, overly dyed blond hair onto my mat.  DEEP BREATH...can't this twit tell I am nursing serious wounds over the loss of Yogi Liz?  I struggle through an hour of class next to this girl, wishing I hadn't.

I role up my mat, gather my stuff, and get a glimpse of myself in the mirror, looking depressed, sad, and mopey..BOO...I sling my mat into the car and vow to try again another day. 
Despite the fact that I can hear blondie smacking her gum in my sleep, I won't give up on my yoga.  I get a moment to myself where I can center myself, strengthen myself, push myself, and in the end of class snooze on the floor for the best 5 minutes of my day!
Who knows, maybe I'll get crazy and go to yoga school, and become a guru and have my own groupies!  Ahh...the possibilities!

NAMASTE